Chaiming In

May 20, 2009 | Comments (0) | by Chaim Witz

-So Mini Fist was a rousing success, so long as you define success as a Cubs rain out, followed by 5 hours of heavy drinking at The Gingerman, your favorite handsome blogger passed out by 7:30, and Wolter and Chip Wesley ending the night at a bar designed for boys who like boys. Now that's what I call "arousing success"! (Enter Dave Thomas playing Yakety Sax on kazoo.)

Special thanks to reader and TMS loyalist Nick V for making an appearance. Nick, I technically remember you being there and donning a black t-shirt and close cropped hair, but other than that, you're a mystery to me.

-It's been a little slow going here on the site as far as content goes, save for the arousing success of the Song of the Day. That proved to be about as popular as Magic Johnson's talk show, or more to the point, every other music venture TMS has done. But really...interested in writing for the site? Send some samples to Let's be honest. You don't even need to be that good. Relatives of crappy relief pitchers need not apply.

We already have one new writer. Ladies and gentlemen, Null Void! Scrolling down, it looks like he already pre-dated some really good posts. The Saloon will rise again, don't you worry. Dear reader, it's up to you to help spread the word about this site. It can be bigger than Ashton Kutcher's Twitter feed!

-A hearty congrats to fellow bartender and fake baker The Hundley who finally ties the knot this weekend. I know a lot of people were "getting worried" about The Hundley, and I'm not just talking about his drinking problem, which is a whole different beast. Oddly, none of the other bartenders were invited to this surely extravagant (not to mention sordid) affair, but rest assured that a Trojan Horse will arrive at the chapel just in time. (Dave Thomas: "Did somebody say Trojans?")

-The Cubs got PWNED by Joel Pinero tonight. He was really Maddux-esque. By the way, it's not pronounced Jol. It's Joe-EL. I bet that drunk LaRussa still pronounces it wrong. LaRussa reminds me of my old freshmen baseball coach. What a dick that guy was. Once I missed a cut-off throw and he made me sit on the pitcher's mound cross legged, while he hit infield with a fungo. Ground balls whizzed past my head as I prayed for Jesus to deliver me and strike that man down. That's the day I stopped believing in a higher power.

-Finally, here are some underrated things that you need to get your hands on:

Whole Grain Waffles. Way better than regular Eggos, and one would imagine better for you. Holy shit those things are good when you're on the run in the morning. No syrup needed. Throw some butter on those motherfuckers and make it rain!

Onitsuka Tiger shoes by Asics. Great all-purpose tennis shoe, good for kicking it around town. Comfortable as hell and stylish enough that the ladies will all want to rub your inner thigh.

Saturn Astra
. GM really dropped the ball (as usual) on this underrated gem. Great car for the big city. Also stylish enough that the ladies (and dudes) will want to rub your inner thigh.

The Old Man and the Sea. Quick read. Classic read. And I don't even like fishing!

The Godfather Trilogy on BluRay. Mesmerizing. Brando in HD will make you shit your pants like George Brett.

The Cubs t-shirt I bought at MiniFist. As I apparently kept repeating, "Look at how blue it is!"