Fire Joel Southern

May 08, 2008 | Comments (3) | by Governor X

If you follow Elmhurst College baseball as I do, you'll know its time for Coach Joel Southern to go. The team has completely collapsed and every bit of the blame can be laid at his feet.

Southern is a prude who can't relate to college kids

A good coach has to be able to relate to his team on some level. Southern can't. He's as stuffy as an amish school marm. During their Spring trip to Minneapolis and Tempe, he went out of his way to tell the kids not to look at porn. Porn is a man's god given right and I'll be damned if some two-bit hack baseball coach is going to say otherwise. On the same trip, Southern had an aneurysm because the team watched Superbad, which apparently is too racy for his taste.

Southern doesn't curse

You can't trust a man who doesn't curse. The worst you'll hear come out of his mouth is the occasional "Judas Priest!". Pathetic.

Southern is a crappy manager

He just flat out isn't that good at managing a game. You'll see shades of Dusty Baker if you watch closely. During the Tempe trip, it was clear the starting pitcher didn't have it in one of the games and gave up a boatload of runs. The team managed to scratch its way back, eventually tying the game. Any coach worth his salt would be glad that they were back in it, pull the starting pitcher and live to fight another day. Not Southern, he sent the struggling pitcher back to the mound and the team promptly fell behind again.

On that same day (March 22nd), the team was playing a double header against Knox College - naturally Southern let the catcher play both games of the double header. By the end of the 2nd game, the catcher could barely move. Some 30 kids made the trip to Arizona, but less than half actually saw some playing time that day.

Southern has lost control of the team

The team no longer respects him, and it shows. In the season's wrap up game, a player swung 3-0 because he didn't want to take a walk. Southern actually yanked him, but it was too little too late as the team finished up the season with a sorry 12-28 record.

Fire Joel Southern now and lets bring Elmhurst College back to glory!


Anonymous @ 12:19 AM, March 26, 2011

This man couldn't handle a pitching staff on a T-Ball team! He has no respect from his team, which is needed. Actually, he's the butt end of most jokes. A penny pinching, dollar foolish, SOB that has no right being in charge of other peoples adult children. His wife would probably throw him out if he took care of his own kids the way he takes care of his college baseball team.

Anonymous @ 9:28 PM, April 03, 2011

i agree

Anonymous @ 12:26 PM, November 09, 2023

I agree