The Gist: Game 32

May 05, 2008 | Comments (0) | by Rich Funk

The Game: Games like this are frustrating. The Reds are one of those teams that we're "supposed" to beat. And while nothing is ever set in stone, we should be able to take it to teams like the Reds if we want to repeat as division champs.

Things Looked Bad When: Rookie pitcher Johnny Cueto struck out 5 in the first 2 innings. Why is it that the Cubs always have trouble with rookie pitchers, even if they're getting lit up by everyone else? Remember when Josh Becket made his first career start against the Cubs and was nearly perfect? Remember Oliver Perez's rookie year when everyone was knocking him around, and he shut out the Cubs? Let's put it this way: Cueto had been lit up his last 3-4 times out, but I had absolutely no hesitation plugging him into my fantasy lineup this morning.

The Viagra "Stiffy Of The Game": Geovany Soto. Soto continues to be one of the more consistent players we've got. And it seems like he always comes up with a homer whenever the rest of the lineup is struggling. His 3-3 day today brings his season line to .352/.448/.667-6-24.

The Preparation H "Asshole Of The Game": Mike Fontenot. The Cubs managed to get the bases loaded in the top of the 9th with only 1 out. The ball got away from Paul Bako and Fontenot tried to score from 3rd. He was out. By a lot. Asshole.

What Comes Next: We can't dance around the fact that the Cubs are playing like crap right now. Ever since we took both games from the Mets a couple weeks back, we split with Colorado and lost 2 of 3 to Washington, Milwaukee and St. Louis. What's worse is that we face Aaron Harang tomorrow without Thunder Matt, who OWNS Harang. After that, we face Edinson Volquez (remember what I said about rookie pitchers baffling the Cubs?), Dan Haren, Max Scherzer (another phenom rookie) and Randy "The Cubs Are My Bitch" Johnson. Right now, I'd be happy to go 3-2 over that stretch.

Pray to Jobu.