Get Your Grill On

May 23, 2008 | Comments (0) | by Rich Funk

We all love to barbecue. Or is it BBQ? WTF?

Either way, with the holiday weekend coming up, there's going to be a lot of grillin' goin' on. So what have you got on your back porch?

What? That's it? That's not gonna attract the ladies! You need to get with the times, geezer. I'll bet that Old Man Chaim's got that same old grill at his house. You don't want to be old like him, do you?

You want some awesome grills that will punch you in the nuts and have you wanting more? Look no further.

For The Redneck In Your Family:

Is Andy Griffith your uncle? Do you own Deliverance on DVD? Like inbred backwoods sex? Then this grill is for you. You know what the grill is for, but what goes on inside the cabin? What goes on indeed...

For The Home Improvement Fan:

More power indeed. I guess a few years ago, Chrysler had a contest where they asked people "What else can you do with a Hemi?" and this guy's grill was the winner. So let me get this straight...there was a contest where you took something that only exists to power a truck and asked people to put it to other uses? And this was the best one? I think the thing that pisses me off the most is that this whole contraption probably cost more than my car. They should have just given the money directly to me. I would have made them a certificate and everything.

For The Guy "Compensating" For Something:

Have a small dick? Buy a bigger grill! Let your kids sit on it!


For Anyone Who Liked The Movie Casino:

Sure, it's a little unorthodox, but you have to make the best of a situation, right?

For The Baby Hater:

Recipes found here.

For The Waaay Too Earth Friendly Geek:

No, that's not a bench to sit on. Two words, broham: Solar. Grill. No gas needed for this piece of work. You know how Hawaiians used to cook pigs by burying them in hot rocks under the sand for hours at a time? In a few thousand years, all we've done as a society is move the rocks from under the sand to the surface. We are a failure.

For Dave Thomas:

This KeGrill is perfect for the alcoholic in all of us. Why get a regular grill when you can get a grill that shows your drinking buddies that you love beer so much, you want to look like you cook with it too! Awesome!!! *Shotguns beer*

For The Theater Kids:

Technically, it's not a grill. But I couldn't pass up a chance to share the BBQ Sword(!) with the world.

For The City:

Wait...I thought Chaim's mom was the worlds largest transportable wiener smoker?