Link Bulimia: Snowstorm of Death Edition

December 19, 2008 | Comments (0) | by White Chili

I live in Chicago. People in Chicago are know for their "character" for dealing with all kinds of weather. Today was one of those days. I started receiving severe winter storm warnings TWO DAYS AGO. I usually bike to work but that wasn't happening today. I stumbled through about two blocks of sidewalks before a snow plow pulled up next to me. Now, I wear a backpack to work. It's nice. I keep a Powerbar in it. This plow driver asked me if I was walking to school. I hope he gets his parole officer something really nice for the holidays.

View from my bedroom window.

After that I stepped in no fewer than two Groundhog Day-size wells of slush. It's a good thing I'm wearing comfy wool socks today. With any luck, trench-foot should set in before noon. BING!

To everyone that loves snow and prays for a blanket of fluffy white powder so they can pile in a minivan and slalom down a man-made hill in the midwest: you can go fist yourselves.

If you happen to find something particularly jarring to where you'll never be able to "un-see" it, please pass it right along to Enjoy and make sure to wash your hands afterward.

Well, the thing about your kid is that he has a foot growing in his brain. (The Denver Channel)

Give me your badge, and your gun! (five tokens to anyone that can identify the Dennis Hopper movie) (Holy Taco)

Christmas shopping: Done (Etsy)

What in God's name is wrong with Drew Carey? My shirt would have been over my head as I ran around the stage high-fiving everyone. (Best Week Ever)

I'd like to follow that up with the absolute dumbest bid ever on the Price is Right. (YouTube)

We here at Pomp Culture are serious about training our new writers. Since I have the most training experience, I've produced a tape so that our quality standards never falter. I can't emphasize how important the four-corner press is. (YouTube)

To: Adolf Hitler Campbell, From: Santa. Yeah, doesn't sound right. (Lehigh Valley Live)

I fancy myself a Godfather fan and I had no idea about this until a few days ago. Who could possibly pull this off today? Nicholson? He'd have to churn out something better than Mars Attacks! if he wants onstage. (Does anyone else find it hilarious that he undermines his entire message by sending her up onstage like that?) (YouTube)

"Oakland Co. stops trips to medical examiner's office after kids see exam of girl from their district." That's about all that needs to be said. (Detroit News)

Haha! Look at you! Oh, and someone call an ambulance. (Break)

You want to know how to throw a party? Just call Admiral Edward Russell. Bartenders paddling around a fountain filled with 400 gallons of brandy in little canoes filling peoples cups for a week? I want to party with you Admiral! (Tasty Booze)