Cubs Sign Professor X

January 26, 2010 | Comments (2) | by Arcturus

In a bold move, today the Cubs agreed to terms with legendary leader of the X-Men, Professor X, Charles Xavier. My assumption is that he will take over the GM duties from human blob Jim Hendry, who will be released back into the wild.

Scratch that, I've just learned that the Cubs in fact signed outfielder Xavier Nady, who's coming off of his second Tommy John surgery. Hendry must have seen the words "second Tommy John" on Nady's resume and Krispey Kremed himself. Mutant.

Unless Nady's physical reveals something hinky (like aftereffects of 2 TJ surgeries), he'll join the Cubs as their fourth outfielder. Nady played in seven games for the Yankees in 2009, putting up a .286 average.


Unknown @ 2:55 PM, January 26, 2010

Great move by the Cubs.

Isn't Charles Xavier the Bizzaro Xavier Nady? I mean...Nady has no use of his elbows while Charles has no use of his legs.

Furthermore...Charles Xavier has really been hitting the fucking weight room.

Gentlemen GaGa @ 6:55 PM, January 26, 2010

Everyone should check out the new album by XX.