Overrated/Underated: Everything Edition

November 04, 2008 | Comments (0) | by Rich Funk

Quick hits! BOO-YAH!

Overrated: Patriots Coaches Not Named Bill Belichick

Remember that Romeo Crennel guy? He coached for the Pats under Belichick and went to the Browns as a hotshot head coach. 3.5 years later, he's fired! That's what happens when you go 23-33 and your players quit on you. Sure he had a 10-6 season last year, but a lot of that had to do with a favorable schedule and the fact that his (also overrated) quarterback played a fantastic first half.

What about that other guy? The other hotshot coach? Charie Weis! Riding the strength of a bunch of players the last coach recruited to Notre Dame, Weis went 19-4. When most of those players left and Weis started having to use the players he recruited himself, he's gone 8-12. Considering Notre Dame plays a pretty easy schedule every year, they'd probably be even worse in an actual conference. In Notre Dame's last 16 games against teams over .500, the Fighting Irish are 1-15. Awesome record.


Underrated: Nintendo 64

With the regular old NES being the retro-gaming console of choice for most of the decade, as well as increased popularity of Sega Genesis and Super Nintendo, the Nintendo 64 sometimes gets lost in the shuffle. NES, Genesis and SNES are all great consoles, but give the N64 its due as well. If you're in the 18-25 age group, how many countless hours have you spent playing Goldeneye while you should have been doing school projects? How much did The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time kick your ass the first time you played it? Don't forget about Starfox 64 either. Or Mario Cart 64. Or Perfect Dark. Or NFL Quarterback Club '99. The damn list goes on and on. The fact that you can wander in to a GameStop and pick up the system for about $35 and games for between $5-10, there's no reason you shouldn't own one.

Underrated: Ranch Dressing

Putting ranch on salad? That's so 1990. I use ranch for just about anything I eat. I dip pizza in ranch dressing and shovel it into my food-hole two hands at a time. Buffalo wings covered in ranch? Hell yeah! I also find myself putting it on toast, pouring it onto cereal, topping ice cream with it and sometimes just drinking it straight. I dare you to name one thing that can't be improved by ranch dressing.

Overrated: $5 Foot Long Sandwiches At Subway

Get the fuck out of my life. I remember when footlong sandwiches were under $4 each back in the old days. Now $5 is supposed to be a steal? Forgive me if I don't spring into action fellating you with thanks. And that song...god dammit...I'd rather listen to someone beating a baby with a cat. Next.

Underrated: Bacon Burgers

I'm not talking about a hamburger with bacon on it. I'm talking about a burger made entirely out of bacon. Just take the bacon, grind it through a meat grinder a few times, and form the bacon bits into patties. Cook, serve, heart attack. What a delicious way to die. Find out more here.

Underrated: Paul Rudd

I'm straight as an arrow, but I would make out with Paul Rudd if he asked. He tickles me in a way that only a young Rob Lowe has in the past. Clueless aside, Rudd is one of the funnier movie stars in Hollywood today, perfectly pulling off the "slacker guy whose dry humor covers up the fact that he actually cares" part that used to belong to Vince Vaughn. And anyone that makes less Vince Vaughn in my life gets 2 thumbs up.

Overrated: The Beach

Fuck the beach. It's hot, it's wet and it's sandy. It's full of douchebags playing catch with either a football or a Frisbee. It smells like dead fish. On an increasing amount of Southern California beaches, you can't even drink anymore. Stop me when I get to the part that's supposed to be appealing.

Underrated: Tracy Morgan

Watch this. Thank me later.