Death League Update: Carl Pohlad

January 07, 2009 | Comments (0) | by Chaim Witz

Carl Pohlad, owner of the Minnesota Twins baseball club, died on Monday at age 93. Some people die alone. Mr. Pohlad died fabulously wealthy. Carl (if I may) was born in Iowa, making him infinitely more successful than any of the Iowans writing for this website. Under his leadership the Twins won two World Championships (87' and 91'), though charges of 'stinginess' and 'miserly ways' were often times levied against him. Fellow bartender The Hundley refutes this claim and applauds Mr. Pohlad for building equity.

As rich as he was, we would like to think that the dearly departed would have enjoyed the stylings and mission statement of Pomp Culture. His son William was a producer on the Oscar-nominated "Brokeback Mountain". We'll never know if Mr. Pohlad approved of this venture.

Four points are awarded to Chaim Witz.