Titles for Discarded Posts

January 08, 2009 | Comments (0) | by Chaim Witz

I have writer's block. I can't think of anything important to say, and clearly this site runs on important ideas. Sitting here in front of the computer, sweating and nude, the little flashing bar mocks me. It mocks my lifestyle, my sexuality and the fact that I once had shingles. Crying and cradling my non-descript, nude body, I try in vain to think of something to write about. Anything. I type random strings of words into the title space, but then think to myself, "Well that's dumb" or "Eh, that seems like it might be a lot of work".

So instead, I present to you the discarded titles of posts that I thought about writing. Here is the challenge. In the comments, tell me which one you would actually like to see me write about and I will heed that challenge with the gusto and vigor of Andy Rooney attacking a pastrami on rye. That said, I expect no one to comment. Without further ado, here is the list.

"Boners. Seriously, Who Came Up With That Word?"

"The Curious Case of Me Sleeping With Your Father"

"Overrated/Underrated: Cheese Edition"

"God I'm Sad"

"Gene Shalit Reviews Sausage"

"Pro Wrestling: Real or Clever Ruse?"

"I'm Having a Stress Induced Heart Attack Because My Life if Going Nowhere"

"Pomp Movies: Porno Edition"

"I'm Gonna Review Local Restaurants Even Though You Don't Live Here"

"Why Won't My Shoes Ever Stay Tied?"

"Does This Sweater Make Me Look Like an Asshole?"

"Mark or Dorothy: Pick Your Hamil(l)"

"Winter: Fuck You"

That's it really. Cheers.

*Funny picture courtesy of Toothpaste for Dinner! LOL. OMFG!