TMS Ombudsman

October 16, 2007 | Comments (0) | by Brant Brown

A Retort to the Billy Boyd Controversy
Over the last few days, the e-mail box at The Saloon has been inundated by fans of Scottish actor Billy Boyd. Their complaint is drawn from an innocuous reference to the actor in a throwaway post by Daft Funk last Friday. We at The Saloon pride ourselves on fact-based journalism and comprehensive research. However, we do take the liberty of making an occasional joke, particularly if it comes at the expense of a Scotsman. Though we admire the tenacity of female Billy Boyd fans, they must temper their enthusiasm in light of the fact that The Saloon caters to the realm of sports and American popular culture. Though we enjoy many cultural aspects of the United Kingdom, we do not claim to be experts on any of them (the exception of course being The Governor's uncanny grasp on British Parliament. And U2).

In regard to Mr. Boyd specifically, we have been informed by his admittedly obsessive supporters of his burgeoning career. While they take great pride in his modesty and avoidance of the cold grasp of Hollywood, they need to realize that this works to their own detriment. Scotland continues to be a small, misunderstood land to most Americans. What better way to dispel the myths of men not wearing underwear, the subsistence on whiskey from the highlands, and their unwavering support of Idi Amin, than by making a name for himself through the great American medium of cinema?

We would implore Billy Boyd to take advantage of his broad popularity to rectify these misunderstandings by halting his musical endeavors and charity work in Scotland, and embracing the progressive opportunities of Hollywood. Purchase a home in Beverly Hills, along with a penthouse in New York. Use your supposed charm and international appeal to adopt a child from Malawi and bring attention to the plights of the developing world. Build that IMDB list, Billy Boyd. Do it for yourself and your homeland.

On Dusty Baker
Screams of injustice have been ringing throughout Cincinnati stemming from the hiring of Dusty Baker over the weekend as manager of the Reds. If you have read anything of this story, you will know that Baker is the first African American manager in club history. As is customary, even in this 21st century, race has dominated all discussions. Some ticket holders have gone so far as to call Baker a racist by drumming up a three-year-old quote in which he surmised that African American and Latino players were better conditioned than their Anglo contemporaries to handle the mid-summer sun. This outrage coming from the fanbase that vehemently supported Marge Schott. Unfortunately for the city of Cincinnati, such anti-Baker statements only reflect the underlying racism that still pervades our country. Listen, we've been there, done that with Baker. We feel your pain. But please don't allow prejudices to dominate the headlines over the next three years. And be thankful that Neifi Perez is no longer in Major League Baseball's good graces.