Torre To Yankees: "Eat Me."

October 18, 2007 | Comments (0) | by Rich Funk

Ever since the Yankees were eliminated by the Indians last week, my mind has been filled with different scenarios involving Joe Torre and the Yankees. Here are the potential outcomes that I considered to be acceptable:

1. The Yankees fire Torre, all their fans turn on them, A-Rod opts out, Posada and Rivera leave, Yankees finish last in 2008.

2. The Yankees offer Torre a deal, he turns it down, the fans back Torre and turn on management, A-Rod opts out, etc.

3. The Yankees offer Torre a contract. Torre takes a dump on Big Stein and asks for $20 million a year. Somehow, the Yankees get Texas to throw in $14 million of that per year.

Honestly, one way or another, did anyone expect Torre to be a Yankee next year? How much abuse can a man take? The Yankees have made the playoffs for 12 straight years! Sure, the Yanks have crapped out over the last few years and haven't won it all since 2000, but that's not Torre's fault. He can't go out to the mound and throw 8 innings himself, which is the only thing that could have helped the Yankees over the last few years.

I'm glad Torre stuck up for himself. Just like Marty Schottenheimer is doing right now, Joe can sit back next baseball season, pick up the newspaper or turn on ESPN whenever he wants to, and laugh at the situation his old team is in. Seriously, these Yankees are done for. After A-Rod opts out and Posada and Rivera follow him out the door, does this team scare you?

C: Someone crappy. Probably Michael Barrett.
1B: Doug Mienxlplykiviwicz (Old)
2B: Robinson "I have to try during the first half too?" Cano
3B: Wilson Betemit
SS: Derek Jeter
OF: Melky Cabrera
OF: Johnny Damon (Old)
OF: Hideki Matsui (Old)
DH: Jason Giambi (Old)

Combine that with a starting rotation of Mussina, Pettitte, Kennedy, Hughes and Chamberlain and no bullpen (Who's gonna close? Farnsworth? HA!), and you've got the makings of a 4th place team.

"Eat shit."
"No, you eat shit first!"