Good Morning Vietnam!

July 08, 2007 | Comments (0) | by Chaim Witz

I've got a full pot of coffee. Toast with jam. The Sunday Tribune. The Best Buy ad placed strategically by the toilet. It's pushing 90 degrees out side but it's a comfortable 68 degrees on my couch. I am ready for the Cubs to start.

My two favorite teams squaring off in the rubber game of the series. Our ace, Carlos Zambrano vs. Shane Youman, a 43rd round draftee that reeks of 'Les Walrond'. Jason Bay looks like he may never hit a baseball again. This sounds like a recipe for victory.

Cubs Victory Over Pirates (Serves 2)

-1 part Ryan Theriot 'sexy time' mustache
-2 parts Aramis Ramirez Razorblade Oakleys
-2 parts Zambrano Red Chile Pepper (Extra Hot)
-Liberal doses of Pirate apathy

Combine all ingredients in a blender with ice and serve chilled with a side of Hank White.