Hump Day Hottie: Brooklyn Decker

August 12, 2009 | Comments (0) | by Ginger Russ

So what do blogs do when readership is down and loyal followers are waning? Well, put up some pictures of hot girls of course. Has TMS stooped to this level? Apparently, yes. Actually not really. I just wanted to lower the bar a little bit here at the Saloon. As a blogger over at College of Idiots, I know the power of posting pictures of hot girls. To this day, after more than 50,000 hits, the main page that is still looked at is the post about Adam Archuleta. Why that crappy ex-Bear and now starter for the Vegas UFL league affiliate you ask? Because by the power of Google, almost 25% of our hits are people searching for pictures of Jennifer Walcott, Arch Deluxe's fiance.

And so I introduce a feature into the Saloon which was once a regular at my first and now defunct blog, the Lazyman's Blogpost. What could possibly go wrong with this? I mean the Saloon is pretty much a sausage-fest. A Triangle frat party. An episode of Beauty and the Geek, only without the Beauty. BTW, have you seen Megan Wants a Millionaire?...strike that. Really though, if it works for sites like Holy Taco, Uncoached and of course every male magazine from Playboy to FHM, it has to work for TMS. Right?

And so I bring you the inaugural edition of the Hump Day Hottie: Brooklyn Decker. I saw Brooklyn Monday morning on the Dan Patrick Show, which while being a radio show has crossed over to television via the DirectTV network. Brooklyn is a Sport Illustrated swimsuit model, but is more famously known as Andy Roddick's wife. I learned a little about Brooklyn's background watching the show and by stalking researching her on the internet.

Brooklyn was born in 1987 in you guessed it...Ohio. Despite being from the land of incest, she is pretty hot and actually pretty well spoken. Let's just say you won't find her on an episode of Rock of Love. She knows her stuff for the most part about sports, claims to be athletic although can't hit a golf ball worth a shit and her favorite sports figure is of course her husband, who she regularly attends his matches. She's apparently fine with being married to a loser, which gives all us bloggers a glimmer of hope in the world. So you're saying there's a chance?

Her stats measure 36-24-34, making her 2 inches shy in the hips to be a perfect girl according to the Violent Femmes. She likes "manly men" and is against manscaping, although would prefer you don't have a hairy back. She handled herself pretty well on the DP Show while 5 desperate and googly-eyed 40-somethings mind-fucked her and even Dan himself asked her if she wanted to watch his Emmy pop up.

What else can be said about Brooklyn? I can't find any sports affiliations besides tennis, so let's just say she is a Cubs fan. She was Sharapova's Thigh of the Week earlier this year in February and is now the first TMS Hump Day Hottie. Congrats Brooklyn!

Go Cubs!